Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
