Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
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