At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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