scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
