Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
