I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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