how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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