I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
