I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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