I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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