please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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