Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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