You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
