Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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