I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
