if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My vagina is officially offended.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
