Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
