if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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