the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
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