So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
