I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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