Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I look better un-naked...
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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