Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Randomize
