You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
