check it out our google latitudes are spooning
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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