bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
