Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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