I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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