Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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