Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize