Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
