If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
