you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
