Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize