I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
