She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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