She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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