I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize