He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
