i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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