OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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