Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
