Duck Duck Cougar?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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