I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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