She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize