I must be too annoying 4 u.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
