Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
