i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today