Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
