can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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