You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
This baby is an asshole
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
