Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
